he is a movie

and i have just unabashedly flirted with him.

but he is Deaf so he will find his way here, maybe, because someone will alert him

to the dangers of being friendly with me

and maybe he will think this is all lies, too

that i am just setting him up, trying to fuck with him

but he makes all parts of me go SQUEE and of course

i have gotten "all the details" pertinent to someone who thought it pertinent

to me. "heartbroken" and i don't really give a fuck

"warning he will tease you and leave you hanging, he knows everyone wants him"

and i really don't give a fuck

because all it is is a little flirtation with a friendship request and

a little friendship requested can become anything

flirtations melt away and solid friendships remain

or he will just read this and think

i am nothing but a stack, a bunch, a wad of lies

and that i deserve nothing and that is all

that would matter

but  he is a movie

and i love his movies and i want them to never-endingly reel

i want to knit and knit and ravel his ravel

and sometimes i think he would be hot wrapped around me

but that is just a movie

he is a movie, and i think

he is stellar

(and for once i am not trying to just get into a 25-year-old's pants and scream laughter pummeling his thighs with my feet over a blaze)